There is little doubt that more and more people are dipping their toes into the world of kink. In addition to the general cultural shift towards more open and accepting attitudes regarding sexuality, books like “Fifty Shades of Grey” brought bondage and discipline (BDSM) and other kink practices into the public eye. Online communities have also provided spaces for people to learn, discuss, and share their experiences.

In fact, a US study found half of Americans have a kink they’d like to try with their partner — but are too afraid to bring up, while a study carried out in Norway found that 34% of respondents had carried out BDSM play.

Maybe you’re curious, or perhaps you’ve already tried but want to explore further. Embracing kink can be a fulfilling journey, but it’s important to approach it with care and respect. Here’s your guide to getting started safely and confidently.

What is Kink?

Kink encompasses a wide range of non-traditional sexual practices, from BDSM to fetishes and role-playing. If you’d like to delve deeper, VICE put together a list of some of the most popular practices including edging, foot fetish, and puppy play. But what they all have in common is the desire to explore outside of conventional norms.

Lead with Communication and Consent

The cornerstone of any kink activity is communication. Open, honest dialogue with your partner(s) about your interests, limits, and boundaries is key. Discuss what you’re curious about and listen to their thoughts, feelings, and concerns. Then address them and talk through until you are all comfortable going forward.

Consent must be enthusiastic and ongoing—never assume. Establish safe words or signals to make sure everyone remains comfortable and safe during your sexploration.

Safety First

Safety in kink extends beyond physical measures. Yes, knowing the risks and how to mitigate them (like understanding how to safely use restraints) is crucial. But emotional safety is also important.

Be aware of potential emotional triggers and have a plan for aftercare—this is the time after where partners comfort and care for each other, ensuring everyone feels secure and supported.

Explore Your Desires

So, what’s your kink?

Start by reflecting on your interests. What excites you? What are your boundaries? There are countless resources available, from books and websites to workshops and forums, that can help you learn more about specific kinks. Engaging with the kink community, whether online or in person, can provide valuable insights and support.

Start Slow

If you’re new to kink, ease into it. Start with light activities and gradually explore more intense experiences as you feel comfortable. For instance, if you’re interested in bondage, start with simple, loose ties before moving to more complex restraints. Remember, it’s a journey—there’s no rush to try everything at once.

If you’re looking for inspiration, check out [SKYN’s toy portfolio], and [other blog articles].

Aftercare

Aftercare is a vital part of the kink experience. It involves checking in with your partner after a scene, providing physical and emotional comfort. This could be anything from cuddling and talking to providing water and snacks. The goal is to ensure that both partners feel cared for and grounded after an intense experience.

Ready?

Exploring kink can be an exciting and rewarding, but it requires respect, and a commitment to ongoing learning. Prioritize communication, consent, and safety. As you navigate this new territory, remember that kink is about mutual enjoyment and shared pleasure. Approach each experience with an open mind, and you’ll discover new dimensions of intimacy.

You might have noticed a new sentence on our condom packs: ‘Always ask for consent before engaging in sexual activity.’ In this post we break it down and discuss enthusiastic consent: what it is, why it’s crucial, and how to practice it.

What Is Enthusiastic Consent?

Enthusiastic consent means that all parties involved are genuinely excited and eager to participate. It’s not just the absence of a “no,” but the presence of a resounding, enthusiastic “yes!” This type of consent should be:

• Active: A clear and unambiguous agreement expressed verbally or through affirmative actions.
• Mutual: Everyone involved must give and receive consent equally.
• Ongoing: Consent should be maintained throughout the activity and can be withdrawn at any time.
• Informed: All parties should understand what they are consenting to, including any risks or boundaries.

Why Is It Important?

• Empowerment and Respect: Enthusiastic consent ensures that all individuals feel respected and empowered in their sexual interactions. It fosters a culture of mutual respect and communication.
• Clear Communication: It encourages open dialogue about desires, boundaries, and comfort levels, leading to more satisfying and safe sexual experiences.
• Prevention of Misunderstandings: By seeking and confirming enthusiastic consent, misunderstandings and miscommunications are minimized. This is crucial for preventing situations that could lead to feelings of discomfort, violation, or harm.
• Legal and Ethical Safeguards: Practicing enthusiastic consent aligns with legal standards and ethical norms. It helps protect all parties from engaging in non-consensual acts that could have serious legal and emotional repercussions.

How It Works

• Ask Open-Ended Questions: Instead of seeking a simple “yes” or “no,” ask questions like, “How do you feel about trying this?” or “Does this feel good for you?”
• Check In Regularly: During any sexual activity, check in with your partner(s) to ensure they are still comfortable and willing. Phrases like “Is this still okay?” or “Do you want to keep going?” are helpful.
• Look for Non-Verbal Cues: Enthusiastic consent can also be communicated through body language. Pay attention to your partner’s reactions and expressions. Are they actively participating and responding positively?
• Respect Boundaries: If someone expresses discomfort or asks to stop, respect their boundaries immediately. Consent can be revoked at any time, and it’s essential to honor that.
• Educate Yourself and Others: Understanding the nuances of consent is a continuous learning process. Engage with educational resources and encourage others to do the same.

It Takes Two (or more)

Enthusiastic consent is the cornerstone of healthy, respectful, and fulfilling sexual relationships. It’s about creating an environment where all parties feel safe, valued, and excited to share intimate experiences.

By prioritizing enthusiastic consent, we contribute to a culture of mutual respect and open communication, paving the way for more positive and consensual interactions. For more information and resources on practicing enthusiastic consent, check out organizations like Planned Parenthood or the National Sexual Violence Resource Center.

For more information on consent, visit RAINN’s website.

Whether you are going at it solo or with a partner, lube increases pleasure, comfort, and even sexual safety. Forget all the archaic myths and stigma around the usage of lube. It’s not just for when you are not able to get wet enough. Making lube a part of your sex life, helps you feel more erotic sensations than ever before.

Discover SKYN’s range of lubes.

Hands down (pun intended), when used during masturbation or intimate massages, its lubricating effect can increase your levels of stimulation and make sex feel more natural.

Compare this experience to using a dry hand or sex toy, and you will see what we mean. Regardless of your gender, age, and sexuality, personal lubricants can elevate your pleasure.

Now that its many merits have been established, let’s try and understand the three main types of lube available in the market:

• Water-based lube:This is considered one of the best lube types since it can be used safely with most different sorts of sex toys, and condoms (always check though!), and doesn’t usually irritate sensitive skin. What’s more, it’s super easy to clean off with water, and arousal (or warming) and flavored lubes tend to be water-based.
  If we are being nit-picky, the only downside is that it dries up quickly compared to silicone-based lubes, which means you might need to reapply it.
• Silicone-based lube: Thanks to its silky texture, this type of lube is longer-lasting than water-based lubricant. That’s why it is often touted as the best lube for anal sex, even though it is more difficult to clean off. It is compatible with non-silicone toys and condoms, but always check before trying.
• Oil-based lube (and similar products such as coconut oil): Best used for sensual massages, oil-based lubes’ consistency makes them easier to spread. Avoid using it with latex or polyisoprene condoms as the oil tends to increase the chances of the contraceptive tearing. Another thing to be mindful of is yeast infections. A study of 141 sexually active women between the ages of 18 and 65, found that those who reported using oils inside the vagina had a 32% increased risk for yeast infection.

Ready to unlock the next level of pleasure? Choose a lube that is right for you (and your partner). There is something out there for every preference, in terms of taste, scent, and sensations.

Almost all of us struggle with a low or absent sex drive at some point, which can lead to a host of problems—diminished self-esteem, feelings of rejection from a partner, tension in a romantic relationship.

It’s important to remember that there are a litany of external factors that influence the way we feel in the sack—it’s no one’s fault. But there are solutions. Provided you’ve spoken with your doctor to rule out any hormonal or physical causes, here are some of the things you might try to add a little more spice back into your sex life:

• Experiment with sex toys: For many people, the physical component of arousal can be challenging—specifically, knowing what stimulation is necessary and where. If you haven’t quite figured out what works for you, or are curious about what else might feel good, trying out some sex toys alone or with a partner can be instructive (and fun!) Sex toys can help you figure out exactly what pressure you need, at what intensity, and where. Knowing what gives you pleasure can help you feel more confident in the bedroom, and put some excitement back into your sack sessions. Why not try our Sex Toy Quiz and find the right one for you?
• Have sex in different locations: Hey, there’s a reason people always have sex in the bed–it’s soft, warm, and comfy. But what about trying somewhere different? Some couples find it exciting to have sex outdoors (provided it’s in an isolated area)—think camping, secluded beaches. If you’re not quite that adventurous, you could try different rooms in your home—your kitchen, the living room, or maybe your office.
• Role play: Maybe you always had a fantasy of an appliance repairman showing up at your door wearing a tight muscle shirt and … no? Not for you? Almost everyone has one of these fantasies, and it can be fun and titillating to act them out. French maids, police officers, caped and masked avengers—whatever gets your fire started, don’t be afraid to play a little bit of pretend. (Costumes can also come in handy here.)

Above all, a strong sex drive relies on communication. Being able to explain to your partner what feels good, hear what feels good for them, and explore it all in a safe and 100% consensual manner requires an open and honest connection. And ultimately, that strong communication is the pathway to greater intimacy in all aspects of your life, including the bedroom.

Discover SKYN’s condom range.

Here are a few things to consider when choosing the best condom for you:

• Material: Latex is the most common material for condoms, but that doesn’t mean it’s the best. Some people have allergies to latex, so non-latex options such as polyisoprene or polyurethane are available. SKYN’s condoms are made with SKYNFEEL®, a polyisoprene-based material that is softer and more natural-feeling than latex condoms. If you haven’t tried it already, we’d recommend you give it a go!
• Size: Condoms come in different sizes, so it is important to choose one that fits you well to ensure maximum safety and comfort. After all you don’t want one that’s so big it slips off, or so snug it’s unpleasant. The easiest way to calculate the girth of your penis is to wrap a measuring tape around the thickest part of your erect penis. You can use this measurement to decide what size condom you need. The length is less important as a condom that is too long can be rolled down at the base and a condom that is a bit short still offers good protection.
• Texture: Some condoms come with added textures or ribs to enhance pleasure, while others are smooth. This is a topic that’s best discussed with your partner as they might have their own ideas about what they would like to try. If you’re not sure it might be a good idea to get a variety pack and sample the different sensations – There’s something for everyone!
• Lubrication: Some condoms come with added lubricant, while others do not. You can also choose to use a separate water-based or silicone-based lubricant if desired, but make sure it’s compatible with whatever condom you’re using. All SKYN condoms have lubricant added for extra comfort, but there are some with extra lube and several different lubricants you can add yourself.
• Flavors and sensations: Condoms also come with all sorts of flavors and sensations. From Daiquiri flavored condoms to those with warming or cooling gels, there are plenty of options out there!

In short, choose a material you’re comfortable with, a condom that fits properly and then the world is truly your oyster!

Discover SKYN’s condom range.

Why not try our Sex Toy Quiz and find the right one for you?

When searching for the best sex toy for you, it’s important to recognize that there is no shame in using sex toys. Society has often stigmatized the use of sex toys, making it seem like a taboo or shameful act. The reality is that using sex toys is a natural and healthy way to explore your sexuality, and you are truly missing out if you and your partner(s) don’t give one a whirl!

So, throw those negative associations surrounding sex toys out and figure out which sex toy works for you. Owning and using sex toys can be a great way to take control of your sexual pleasure and enjoy a more fulfilling sex life. There is no shame in taking steps to make sure you are fully satisfied.

What should you think about when picking the best sex toy? You should make sure you are thinking about the kind of stimulation you enjoy and what you want to achieve. Are you looking for internal or external stimulation? Do you want something that vibrates or provides pressure? These questions will help you narrow down your options and find a toy that best suits your needs.

If you are adding a toy to the routine and you have a partner, the toy is not the competition, think of it instead as an ally and can be a way to open up conversation with partners about what you like and want to try.

You will also want to consider the toy size and shape you want. If you’re new to using sex toys, you may want to start with something smaller and less intimidating. But if you’re more experienced, you may want something larger or more complex to explore your desires further.

Embrace your sexuality and celebrate your desire to explore it further with a toy!

Why not try our Sex Toy Quiz and find the right one for you?

First off, we believe that every day should be National Orgasm Day, but officially—it’s celebrated
in most countries on July 31st.

To kickoff this momentous holiday, SKYN®’s female pleasure map (play the GeoGuessr challenge here) encourages players to find and explore actual geographic locations relating to female sexual anatomy: Mt. Hood (Oregon, USA), Shaft Road (Bath, England), Crura (Cork, Ireland), Bulb Lane (Florida, USA) and finally Mt. Clitoris (Tadian, Philippines).

Unlike Mt. Clitoris in Tadian, Philippines, the human clitoris should not take hours to reach its peak.

In fact, when women reach orgasm alone, they are able to do so 3-4x faster than with a male partner – and clitoral stimulation is key. It wasn’t until 1981 that the world saw the first anatomically correct images of the clitoris—even today, many women would be surprised to know that the average clitoris is 3.5 inches in size and shaped like a wishbone. As female sexual anatomy is more widely understood, showcased and celebrated, we will all be on our way to closing the orgasm gap and achieving new pleasurable heights together.

The orgasm gap is real and exists strictly in heterosexual relationships; and it refers to the fact that men orgasm more frequently than women. In fact, 95% of heterosexual men, reported that they ‘usually’ or ‘always’ experienced orgasm during sex, compared to 65% of women (and only 39% of college-aged women). The figures vary by study, but the conclusion remains: heterosexual men are coming more than the women they’re sleeping with.

So what gives? Why are straight women having less orgasms than their male counterparts?

Though it could appear that penile involvement is to blame—the orgasm gap is a societal issue. Here are just a few reasons why the orgasm gap is as complex as it is cultural:

• The overvaluing of penetrative sex
• The female pleasure taboo
• Lack of clitoral knowledge

To close the orgasm gap, we have to hold clitoral stimulation and penetration as equal. Most women require clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, and not penetration alone. Both women and men must understand this and really apply this knowledge. Far beyond merely locating the tip of the clitoris, the clitoris in its entirety is a vast and complex web of nerve endings and opportunities for enhanced female pleasure.

Improve your cliteracy.
Use SKYN®’s GeoGuessr map legend to explore the clitoris in its entirety and have better orgasms!

MT. HOOD (Oregon, USA)
Oregon’s highest mountain shares a name with the hooded tissue that protects the human body’s most sensitive organ. The clitoral hood shields the clitoris from excessive stimulation and is connected to the labia minora. The hood also produces a natural lubricant, allowing it to move smoothly over the clitoral glans and shaft during arousal. Some times may be too sensitive for direct clitoral contact—stimulating the clitoris over the hood can be much more pleasurable in this case. Heat up the experience with Thrill, a bullet vibrator that can be used as a gentle massager, or as a more intense vibrating device for heightened sensual pleasure.

SHAFT ROAD (Bath, ENGLAND)
Most shafts lead to somewhere worth visiting, and this shaft is no different! When it comes to the clitoris, what we see under the clitoral hood is actually just the tip. The rest of its spongy shaft divides into two “legs” that reach more than five inches inside the female body and vaginal walls. The internal clitoral structure is where it gets even more interesting (and mysterious for some)—and of course, provides even more opportunities for exploration and pleasure.

BULB LANE (Florida, USA)
Florida is hot, but these bulbs are hotter. Clitoral bulbs refer to the two elongated masses of erectile tissue, typically situated on either side of the vaginal opening. During arousal, the bulbs become erect and fill with blood, tightly cuffing the vaginal opening and inducing feelings of pleasure. The blood inside the bulb’s erectile tissue is released into the circulatory system by spasms of orgasm. Why not start off with some Excite Gel? Its revolutionary formula helps to reach orgasm more consistently. Apply one pump of gel to your fingertips, then touch the clitoris and massage with gentle strokes…

CRURA (Cork, IRELAND)
Offering impressive sights and small-town charm, southern Ireland is not to be missed! This crura however, refers to the two leg-like structures that extend from the bottom of the clitoris and into the walls of the vagina. During sexual arousal, the crura become engorged with blood, as does all of the clitoral erectile tissue. The internal aspect of these structures just means that they can be stimulated from more places (both internally and externally). Bring on the good Vibes! A toy designed to stimulate the thousands of nerve endings in and around the vagina, with 20 different speeds, for maximum pleasure.

Pick up some more tools for exploration here, because when it comes to orgasms, we must never stop exploring. We must give people the tools and the confidence to explore their own sexual pleasure and communicate that with their partners. Adding toys into the mix can be a fantastic way to show your partner exactly what works for you and to increase your level of intimacy. Normalizing and using vibes is a simple way to begin closing the gap.

Closing the orgasm gap may be a long journey… but one thing’s for sure:
pleasure is an endless exploration.

A recent study in the U.S. found that “10% of young male non-problem drinkers reported having
engaged in nonconsensual condom removal since the age of 14. Men who had engaged in this
behavior reported higher rates of STI diagnoses and partners with unplanned pregnancies than
men who had not engaged in nonconsensual condom removal.”1 In another recent study of
young adult women, “12% reported that they had experienced nonconsensual condom removal
by a male partner, while none of the participants reported engaging in nonconsensual condom
removal themselves”.1

While the majority of stealthing is practiced my men, it needs to also be noted that it is possible
for females to also ‘stealth’ their partners, by removing or damaging the condom without their
partner’s consent.

So, what to do if you are a victim of stealthing?

Many victims report feelings of betrayal and a violation of trust—and most importantly, it is never
the victim’s fault. In 2018, a man was found guilty of sexual assault in Germany’s first conviction
for stealthing; but in neighboring Switzerland, the supreme court disagreed—saying that it was
regretfully, not illegal.

If you or someone you know has been a victim of stealthing and don’t know where to turn,
contact the sexual violence resource center or sexual assault hotline in your country.

In deciding that for myself, I redefined what was important during sex: orgasms,
connection, pleasure, affection, intimacy. And that’s empowering.

Interestingly, as I got older and my first partner and I went separate ways, she eventually slept
with a guy… and in her narrative he was the one who ‘took her virginity’.  That definitely made me
question certain things and feel sort of insignificant in her life, which was shitty. But looking
back, now that I’ve had more experiences with women and some men, it’s even more clear for
me, that she was absolutely the ‘loss of my virginity’.

from what I’ve learned, sex is so much more rewarding when there isn’t a focus on one thing, like penetration or ‘virginity’—and this is true regardless of who you’re having sex with.

Lesbian sex is the most intimate sex I’ve experienced, and if you’re able to ignore the
external, heteronormative ideals of what sex should be—it’s also the most freeing.

Let’s see what they had to say :